Hope Springs Eternal

Spring has finally cometh. Finally. With the weather has come an upswing in my mood caused by a few goings on worth mentioning. First my birthday is on Tuesday (04/02), and no, folks, it’s never too late to ask for my personal information so that you may bless with a gift of your choosing. Nah seriously though, aside from that, I also got my tax refund and it was sizeable: a little over 1,100 dollars. But the loyalists among my readership know that the good must be counterbalanced by its opposite. That refund money is going straight to the dentist, as years of dental neglect have left me missing a tooth adjacent to the front two (sorry, I don’t know the technical name for it).

Since I filled out my taxes on a whim (it had been years on top of years since I last filed), this was money I never expected to have, so to see it go doesn’t hurt nearly as much as if it were saved up incrementally. Besides, celibacy, is a hell a drug, and should I ever want to kick it habit so to speak, the hideous gap needs to be fixed like yesterday.

I’m still working at Whole Foods. It’s been a little over four months now, and everything is copacetic. I have become good friends with my co-workers, and aside from that I’ve been seeing more of my roommate. Initially, the social skills were so rusty that it took a good deal of blazing and drinking to even entertain the prospect of holding an extended conversation with him, or anyone else, in close quarters, but thankfully, I have been able to cut back on the Mary Jane, as well as the alcohol.

I stepped on the scale for the first time in months the other day and it read 192.5. This is about 10-12 pounds higher than my ideal weight of 180 lbs, but it’s nothing for me to tighten up on the eating and get back to exercising. I started doing pushups again and am up to the low 40’s if I from fresh to failure. I did some running yesterday, as well, and once I get some shoes that actually provide some ankle support, I’ll be going hard again on the fitness tip. I was in a complete, “get it right, and keep it tight” campaign around this time last year, where I wittled my body fat down to 10.9% and weighed a mere 174 lbs. I doubt I’ll get that obsessive with it this year, for a number a reasons, but I’ll make sure there won’t be any anxiety about taking the shirt off should the situation call for it this summer.

Though much of the same is still weighing me down, the aforementioned seasonal change and the goodness and warmth that accompanies it, has left me feeling lighter if you will, but under the surface here’s a list of things that I wish I could change:

My location (still have Georgia on my mind)

My finances (you know the medical, credit card, and loan debt, lack of disposable income)

My singleness (now that the tooth is getting fixed I kinda fancy having a womanfriend at some point)

While this is an abbreviated list, here is an equally abridged list of things that I’m happy about:

My independence

My bed (a queen sized mattress and friend, with extra plush bedding to match its regality)

The weather (while I don’t think I qualify as having seasonal affective disorder, the warmth definitely does make me happy).